Vampire Residence (Staten Island)

Vampire Residence
Location information
Location	Staten Island, New York
Residents	Nandor Nadja Laszlo Cravensworth Colin Robinson Guillermo de la Cruz Nadja Doll

The Vampire Residence is the home of the Staten Island vampire pod consisting of Nadja, Laszlo, Nandor, and Colin Robinson, as well as Guillermo de la Cruz.

Guillermo is responsible for maintaining the house, for which his duties consist of ensuring no sunlight can enter through the windows or any other opening, as well as disposing of bodies. Neighbours of the house include Sean Rinaldi, his wife, Charmaine, as well as Phil and his girlfriend.

History

Colin "came with the house", which has likely been in his possession for at least a century. At some point, Colin installed a secret room to hold journals with accounts of his past lives and information about himself, as his incremental 100-year life span necessitates he keep records so that he remembers everything when he is reborn again.

The other three vampires sailed to Staten Island from England, and signed an agreement soon after getting off of the boat regarding which of them would get first choice of their bedrooms, and because Nandor was not present at the time, Laszlo, who was first to arrive, chose first due to an exception. They have been living in the house together since at least 1924.

Notable features

The mansion is 8,474ft², with three floors.

Main floor:

• Entrance hallway
• Kitchen
• Pantry
• Fancy room; a sitting area where house meetings are often held
• Nandor’s room
• Nadja and Laszlo’s room, later renovated to be a walk-in closet
• Guillermo’s room, a repurposed closet beneath the right side of the staircase

Upstairs:

• Dining room
• Bathroom
• An attic, previously used for storage and as a temporary guest room for The Baron, until it was again repurposed as sleeping quarters for Nandor's 37 wives, then Marwa and Nandor, and eventually renovated into a "man cave"

Basement:

• Colin’s room
  • Hidden room of journals
• Elvis Presley's room, rented by him prior to joining Simon's crew, The Leather Skins
• A cell in the basement used to keep human victims who have yet to be completely drunk as well as anyone who requires long-term isolation, such as Guillermo or Nandor

Outside:

• Potting shed
• A yard with topiaries shaped and maintained by Laszlo.

Notable incidents

2019

• Baron Afanas stayed at the house during an attempt to have the vampires take over the New World, during this stay he killed Laszlo and Nadja’s then familiar June. He was accidentally burnt to near-death by sunlight when Guillermo opened the front door. The Baron was subsequently buried in the topiary garden.
• A pack of werewolves attempted to mark the yard as their territory, causing a brief feud with the house vampires.
• Laszlo and Nadja’s familiar, Justin, was crushed to death by a falling bookcase due to Laszlo’s cursed witch skin hat. The floorboards then broke underneath Laszlo.
• The house hosted the 2019 Bi-Annual Vampire Orgy, but this ended early after Laszlo made an embarrassing public announcement.
• Nadja’s lover, Jeff Suckler, was accidentally decapitated after motorcycling into the wire supporting one of Laszlo’s topiaries.

2020

• After the vampires escaped an execution attempt from the Vampiric Council, they had several vampire assassins sent to the home, all of which were discreetly killed by Guillermo.
• Laszlo and Nadja went through multiple familiars who all died in freak accidents around the home. One such familiar, Topher, became resurrected back as a zombie and tried to kill Guillermo.
• The ghost of Jeff haunted the house until Nadja told him to leave. The vampires held several séances and brought back the ghosts of their dead human selves.
• Colin Robinson received a promotion at work and gained a significant amount of power, so much so that he almost killed his own roommates by draining them excessively. This ended when Colin cloned himself and his copies bored each other to death.
• The amount of corpses Guillermo buried in the yard caused multiple sinkholes. When Jim the Vampire attempted to pursue a fleeing Laszlo, he became stuck in a sinkhole.
• Nadja invited Simon the Devious to stay at the house out of pity. During this stay, his companion Carol was killed in self-defence by Guillermo. Simon later used his stay as an opportunity to try to steal back Laszlo’s witch skin hat.
• Laszlo and Nandor were kidnapped by witches in the yard. Their familiar, Black Peter, messed up the house while the residents were away.

2022

• The house fell into disrepair over the yearlong period in which Laszlo took care of Baby Colin Robinson.

Residents

Current residents

• Colin Robinson
• Guillermo de la Cruz
• Laszlo Cravensworth
• Nadja
• Nadja Doll
• Nandor

Former residents

• Benjy Everett
• June
• Justin
• Topher Delmonico
• Elvis Presley
• Marwa
• Numerous other familiars

Temporary residents

• Baron Afanas
• The Baron’s familiar
• Carol
• Count Rapula
• The ghost of Jeff Suckler
• Simon the Devious

Behind the Scenes

• The mansion as it appears in What We Do in the Shadows is the slightly altered exterior of the Cranfield House, located at 450 Pape Avenue in Toronto.

Appearances

• What We Do in the Shadows (TV series)

Gallery